Still with me?  I know I’m slow with the updates but am on Mexican time now, so is the internet!  Not to mention I was on the wrong time entirely for a good while…not sure for how long!  More on that later..

So I roll into Ely, NV just after 10pm after surviving the encounter at the Mystery Motel of Doom and Axe Murderers which my parents might never forgive me for…(oops…hehe). First things first…WINE!  I have been spotting it at gas stations everywhere super cheap, but decided to just wait until I had arrived.  The Shell station has a HUGE store attached, so I was surprised to find they only had 3 wines, and they were all Barefoot Vineyards.  I guess after all of this driving, I was desperate because I paid $12USD for one where they were $6USD everywhere before that.  EFF!!!  I bought one anyway.  The cashier asked if I would like a paper bag.  I politely declined and turned to leave.  She informed me there is an “open alcohol law here”.

Wut?

“You can’t walk around with open alcohol…..I mean, not that you are, but if you……were….”  I guess this is common here? Haha!

At the Motel 6 I had reserved, the woman at the front desk was not in a cute blue Motel 6 golf shirt like the one in Pendleton.  Nope, this lady was in a food-stained grey tracksuit and was only about 3 cigarettes away from certain death.  She gave me some speech about how it was *supposed* to be her one day off, but no one else could take responsibility for their shifts….”damn kids….blah blah”.  I laughed awkwardly and muttered something about how you just can’t find good help these days….amiright? LOL!

She had a dog with her.  I greet the doggo and he starts wagging his tail.  Poor doggo got in trouble and yelled at.  Sorry, dog.  I thought you were cute ☹

The lady hands me my room key and my receipt, which has a map of the Motel 6 on it.  There is a pool, laundry room, snack room, morning coffee area…SWANKY! With all the effort she can muster to push air over her nicotine coated vocal cords, she apologizes that there are no units available on the bottom floor, therefore, I will need to haul everything up to the second floor, in the freezing and powerful wind.  “Well, that’s what happens when you reserve late, I guess” I said as I accepted my key.  When I went outside, I noticed…..there are only 4 cars here…including mine.  HOW MANY PEOPLE FIT IN THOSE CARS?!?!?!

Once settled in, wine opened, wine consumed, it was shower time.  No bathtub AGAIN, but I didn’t really expect one either.  Just would have been nice after all the driving; and at 6500 feet of elevation, I was COLD!  The shower here wasn’t the Nipple-Blaster 5000 like the last one.  This one was mounted at a “normal” height but had an S shape to it which put it directly in my face.  There was no escaping it.  The shower curtain was stuck to me like I was heading to a toga party.  The pool of water left on the floor was a clear explanation of the rotting soft spot over by the door; this was NOT the first time someone has had a near drowning experience in this shower! I’m glad it wasn’t my time.

The cats had taken to fighting (probably of the play variety) on the bed as I “sleep”…whatever that even is anymore!  And there is no real blanket, which is annoying when it’s this cold.  So all of that, plus Bubba’s nightly repetition of scratching in the litter box for no reason whatsoever, I did not sleep well.  Only a 9 hour drive ahead.  No big deal!

At 9am, I am about ready to go.  I have taken in, and photographed my exotic surroundings and prepared myself mentally for the boring drive through the Nevada desert.  There is even a place called “Nothing”.  I had hoped to get a picture of it but…well, you know.

Sitting on the bed, plotting my route, I look up to see a face in the motel room window.  There is an old Native fellow wearing a pom-pom touque, peering in at me.  He spooked me which sort of spooked him, and then he yells “HOUSEKEEPING!”.  Not sure if he really was housekeeping or not since it was 2 hours before check-out. I was reminded of why I had to use a chair as an extra security measure: the bonus lock on the door was missing….possibly not replaced after the door was kicked in or pried open (hard to tell).

On the road!!

The area where Ely is located is actually quite scenic.  Just a bit outside of the town is the Humboldt National Forest which was odd because there are no trees there.  Just shrubs.  It was a massive forest of shrubbery! So many shrubs!

I was enamoured with the scenery……and this was only the beginning!

After driving on a long straight highway for an eternity, with no turns or hills, I had the line from Sarah in Labyrinth looping through my head: “There aren’t any turns or corners or anything!  It just goes on and on!”

I got out of the car to take a pic on this unbelievably straight highway.  I saw cars coming, so I waited…..but it took a good minute or so before they passed me.  Seriously….it just goes on and ON!!

The wind was unreal!  And cold!  Having only visited Nevada once before to attend Burning Man, this is not what I expected at all;  but at this point, I was around 7500ft and it’s winter, so I guess that makes sense.

As straight as the highway was, it was just spectacular!  Some find long straight drives boring, but had the drive of my life!  If you were to ask 100 completely random people to each build a mountain, and then lined them all up along a lonely highway, THAT is what you’d get.  It was beautifully diverse; and being the sole driver, I was able to really take in my surroundings and enjoy all of the wonderful details without crashing!  As someone so fascinated by the geological wonders of this planet, I was in my element, for sure.

I had skipped breakfast with the idea that I would stop off the interstate in Vegas for a nice lunch, hopefully get an oil change and DEFINITELY get a carwash.  I hadn’t washed Milton since the last few runs on the lake road and felt terrible about it.  Every stop earned me more dirt on my clothes and belongings.

Well, as if I hadn’t learned by now, there is no such thing as “stopping just off the interstate”.  Google maps carefully navigated me through the chaos to the point where I concluded I was NOT going to be stopping in, or anywhere near Vegas.  I was hangry and disappointed I had no time to rubberneck my way through Las Vegas.  When I realized how low on gas I was, I started looking for a U-turn when I *thankfully* rolled into Boulder City.

Price of gas at an all-time high for this trip and no sign of anything to eat other than a Burger King and a sushi joint.  I wanted a Wendy’s.  Why is there never a frigging Wendy’s?  They have salads….SALADS, America!  S-A-L-A-D-S!! They’re real, I swear!

I fuel up and carry on…..still a hangry beast, but that’s the joy of travelling alone.  No one to get offended by my bitchiness!  Whoopee!!!

Next up: Kingsman!  Still not a salad to be found.  I’m going to starve to death, I am sure, so instead of eating a cactus, I brave the Carl’s Jr drive through.  Not sure exactly what happened during the ordering process, but everyone there was pretty excited to see cats at the window.  Perhaps this was all in an effort to distract me from the fact that they did not give me the “real” chicken tenders I had ordered, but some sort of star-shaped processed nuggets.  ARGH!!!! I should have eaten a cactus!

Slightly less hangry and more mildly irritated, I pressed onward to Mesa, AZ.  The road is not very exciting, but easy to navigate, so that’s nice 😊  I think Nothing was supposed to be around here.  Maybe I found it, maybe not. The full moon was about to make an appearance so I pulled over into what appeared to be someone’s driveway (?) and let the kitties have a little food/pee break while I watched the moon come up over the hill.

Well, the cats never moved and I don’t know how long I was out for, but the moon was WAY overhead and my neck was sore.

ALIENS!!!  I’m telling ya!  Haha!

After cruising through a place called “Surprise” (as in you thought you reached Phoenix but SURPRISE!…you still have another 30 miles to go and SURPRISE….still no damn Wendy’s), I was greeted by a closed highway in Phoenix which Google Maps refused to re-route me around, only to arrive at my friend’s community unable to open the gate with the code given, and no cell service.  I drive down the road a bit and try again.  I’m pretty done with everything at this point.

My friend texts “stay where you are…..I’m coming to get you.  Where are you?”

“I don’t know!  I’m by a fucking cactus!”….ahem, *deep breath*  “I’m down the street by a cactus…lol!”

She rescued me, got me ‘home’ and had a chilled beer in my hand before I could even say “hello”.  BLISS!!

I slept for the first time in weeks.  It was comfy, it was quiet, it was GLORIOUS!  And with no plans to be on the road the next day, I shut my alarm off. *BLISS*

I woke up to the smell of coffee and fresh baked muffins.  The backyard and scenery are so perfectly Arizona. The cats had plenty of space to roam about and were clearly thrilled to be out of the damn car! I was really looking forward to coming here and was not disappointed (except by Wal-mart…but that’s different).  I joined my hosts poolside for a lovely REAL breakfast and planned my day.

Wal-mart & and oil change.  Simple!

NOT!

While Cathy was very kind to drive me there, American Wal-mart was disappointing compared to my memories of border-hopping back in the day.  It was expensive and the selection was shitty.  I did get most of what I needed, but the magic was gone.  Walgreen’s would have been sufficient, and far more convenient, but now I know.

The oil change was a good deal, but the guy was reluctant to let me leave with only 2mm left on my front brakes and 2000kms still to go on my trip with a full car.  $300 USD and the problem would be taken care of.  In a panic, I messaged my dad.  I can’t afford that!!  He assured me I could wait until Mexico, so I took a breath, and waited!

Being the type that meticulously makes lists, but still manages to do most things last minute, I was late getting on the road the next day due to thinking getting Mexican car insurance would be easy.  Everyone says it’s easy but my paranoia of doing it wrong made it entirely more time consuming than it should have been.  That and mailing off some last minute taxes, I was a good hour behind my goal.  I promised my parents if the border was busy, I would stay somewhere near there so I wasn’t stuck on a highway at night, which is the Golden Rule of driving in Mexico.  My goal was to reach Hermosillo, Sonora for the night and I am aware there is road construction and possible line-ups at the border.

Did I get my stubborn ass to Hermosillo before dark?  Well……depends on who you ask. Ha!