Introduction To Solo Adventures

Welcome to my latest adventure: Taking the scenic route from BC to Los Ayala!

 

I have already driven almost 4000kms, and have 2000 more ahead of me, and what an adventure it has been!

 

I will do my best to describe my journey to you, but really, it needs to be experienced.  

 

Let me start by saying I am well aware I experience life differently than most.  I have no kids, no partner, and I work online so ‘home’ is wherever I am.

 

I’m not special, extraordinary, nor brave.  I just made different choices, though not always because I wanted to, and here I am later on in life – just rolling with the punches, and flying by the seat of my pants.

 

Most women choose a family.  They find a partner, have kids, go to Little League and occasionally sneak away for a few drinks with other moms.  This was what I wanted when I was younger – well, it was what I thought I wanted because I was really just afraid of being alone.  That ship has sailed and I am glad it did. I still choose family, but not in the sense of creating one. I’m wonderfully blessed with the one I came from and my current lifestyle caters to that.  I also have a network of incredible friends (you know who you are) so being lonely isn’t something that scares me anymore.

 

But that doesn’t mean I don’t have a void in my soul that needs filling.  I still need something rewarding to add substance to my life, and for me that is adventure! I’m pretty sure it’s in my DNA, but I was never really aware of it until 2014 when I started camping alone in order to escape the soul-sucking monotony of the ol’ big-city daily grind, as well as needing time away from the most twisted relationship I’ve ever been in.

 

In only these times, just chillin’ with my tent & journals, was I truly at peace.  

It was in these times I was able to find relief from the absurdity of the relationship I was in.  

It was in these times I was able to talk myself through the bizarre co-dependent relationship I had with my job.  

It was in these times I was able to give myself the courage to be more than just belong to someone.

 

For the first time in my life, I became truly independent.

 

While moms are getting handmade crafts from their kindergarteners, having princess or superhero-themed birthday parties, and tucking their loved ones in at night, I am on a constant search for the next experience that will offer some sort of fulfillment.  The uncertainty is daunting, but also thrilling.

 

So now we have arrived at my point, though I am sure I can talk right past it into the “actual” point. Haha! **EDIT:  I totally do!**

I am a single, independent, 40-year-old woman.  In the last 3 years, I have truly been able to experience my own life without being under the thumb of someone else, nor feeling like I needed to be.  

 

I have street smarts.  

 

I make mistakes, but I am not dumb.  

 

I am strong.

 

I am resourceful.

 

I work well under pressure.  

 

Stress for me is normal and manageable.

 

I am happy.

 

I am whole.

 

Don’t get me wrong – it’s wonderful to be loved and cared about, but being doubted on these hard-earned traits makes these adventures difficult to share. I like to update those who are following my story, but it’s not so much fun to have my most incredible life experiences met with fear, disappointment, doubt, and virtual finger-wags.

 

Just because YOU wouldn’t do it, doesn’t mean it’s wrong or necessarily dangerous. Yes, the world can seem like a scary place, but take a step back from your TV and you will see it’s also very beautiful. I do my research and I follow my gut.

 

I invite you to consider these questions:

If I was with my boyfriend or husband (LOL!), would you be saying “WOW…looks like fun, you two”  or..  “Ohhh…that’s just too scary. I’m SO worried about you BOTH”

Or

 

If I was with a female friend, would you be thrilled to follow our adventure?  Or terrified we’d be Thelma & Louise-ing our way across the country?

 

What if I was a man?

 

What if I was 50 instead of 40?

Does the fact I don’t have a partner and children make me seem “too young”? Or somehow devoid of responsible behaviour?

 

Is there really safety in numbers, or is it safety with a man?

 

It shouldn’t matter.

 

We are all human.  Not all humans are good people, and not all are cut out for adventure, but those who are shouldn’t hold back because of the projected fears of those who made different choices.

 

Sure, I’m far from my hometown – but does that make the places I travel to any more dangerous?  

 

This past winter, in a bizarre mystery, a young man literally vanished without a trace from a busy but isolated ski village near my hometown.

 

If it could happen to a young man there, it could happen to anyone anywhere.

 

The point is, you just never know.  We don’t get to know what will happen next.

 

When we become accustomed to our surroundings, we tend to become complacent and let our guard down.  It is just so familiar, and nothing bad ever happens (or at least not to us or anyone we know), so we forget that anything is possible.  

 

When travelling, hiking, or camping, I am well aware of my unfamiliar surroundings, well aware that I am out in the wild, or in a city where I know very little about the local happenings so I am, therefore, prepared.

 

When in my most familiar places, I am generally not prepared for wildlife, chainsaw-wielding psychopaths, muggers or kidnappers, so to me that is where the greater risk lies.  I also still do nothing about it other than keeping my keys handy, having a location on the nearest fire-poker, and ensuring none of my limbs hang over the edge of my bed at night.

 

So please join me here, and follow along with my journey, not just to Mexico, but in life.  I welcome and appreciate your comments and shared stories, but please refrain from projecting your own fears onto me.  If I stop enjoying life to the fullest because of other people’s unfounded concerns, then that would be the realization of my own greatest fear.

 

Well….other than spiders.

 

Annnnnnd here is where I talk past my point! Haha!

If I commented on every one of your fun Facebook posts about which species of spiders were in that area, how many and how dangerous, and how risky I *think* it is with zero experience of my own, it wouldn’t sound very supportive of your strength, life-skills, and planning, and would probably make me seem like a Debbie-Downer just raining all over your parade.  If there were dangerous critters in the area you chose to visit, perhaps being experienced, you already know.

 

Does the projection of my fear make you feel any better, or any more fearful about spiders?  Are you grateful for my inability to accept spiders? Is it valuable to you? Probably not, but at least I can say “I told you so” when one finally kills you 😉

 

So at 40, I’m really just getting started!  It only gets better from here. But like the skilled mountaineers on Everest, there are no guarantees, and my soul is thriving.

 

Moving forward, I would encourage everyone to take a step back from the media. Don’t let the TV or the internet tell you how to feel.  Follow your heart. Follow your soul. Wherever it takes you is where you’re meant to be <3

Either take the risk or accept the mundane.

You might still get bitten, but you also might not…